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ξεκινώντας με το πρώτο επεισόδιο

[πηγή: youtube The Travel Linguist – Italian 101 4:38]

ή απλώς φορέστε ένα μουστάκι και δοκιμάστε, θα σας βγει.

[πηγή: youtube Family Guy – Peter Speaking Italian 0:43]

 

Τζόουκς

A helium molecule walks into a hotel.
The bellhop asks if he needs any help.
Helium doesn’t react.

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity.
I can’t put it down.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

A cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils.

I wondered why the ball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!

Broken pencils are pointless.

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Banana. Banana who?
..
I’m not peeling very well.

Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre

Lack of general knowledge is my Achille’s knee.

What kind of bees make milk?
boobees

a skeleton walks into a bar, he says to the bartender “Give me a beer and a mop”

A grasshopper works into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey! We have a drink named after you!”. Confused, the grasshopper replies, “You have a drink named Steve?”

What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip off.

A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.
His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”
The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”

The dyslexic devil worshipper sold his soul to Santa.

So this guy with a premature ejaculation problem comes out of nowhere.

A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

Sex confessions of a lonely guy: I once tried my left hand.

Yesterday, I met my friend Horst at the hospital. He’d swallowed a sponge. He says it doesn’t hurt but he’s always thirsty.

Why can’t Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human.

What did the homeless man get for christmas?
Nothing.

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.

Ποιοί είναι οι σημαντικότεροι κωμικοί;

Woody Allen, Charles Chaplin, Mel Brooks, Groucho Marx, Peter Cook, Armando Iannucci, Christopher Guest, Robin Williams, George Carlin, Peter Sellers, Spike Milligan, John Cleese, Terry Jones, Michael Palin, Rowan Atkinson, Chris Morris, Steve Martin, Albert Brooks, Richard Pryor, Bill Cosby, Jerry Lewis, Bill Bailey, Sean Lock, Jimmy Carr, Larry David, Stewart Lee, Stephen Fry, Ricky Gervais, Don Rickles, Norm MacDonald, Garry Shandling, Steven Colbert, Jon Stewart, Rodney Dangerfield, Steve Coogan, Will Ferrell, Chris Rock, Eddie Izzard, Benny Hill, Steven Wright, Jim Carrey, David Cross, John Oliver, Jackie Mason, Sarah Silverman, Louis CK, David Mitchell, Tina Fey, Joan Rivers, Ross Noble, Dave Chappelle, Lewis Black, Jo Brand, Mitch Hedberg, Phil Jupitus, Demetri Martin, Paul Merton, Peter Serafinowicz, Dara O’Briain, Rich Hall, Dom Joly, Kayvan Novak, Amy Poehler, Steve Carell, Chevy Chase, Dane Cook

…και άλλοι βέβαια (αυτοί όμως είναι πάρα πολύ καλοί για αρχή).

λίγο όνιον

[πηγή: youtube New Anti-Smoking Ads Warn Teens ‘It’s G To Smoke’ The Onion]

[πηγή: youtube Pop Star’s Single, ‘Booty Wave’, Most Likely Civilization’s Downfall The Onion]

[πηγή: youtube S House – Meet The N – Ep. 1 The Onion]

[πηγή: youtube S Truth or S Dare – S House – Ep. 2 The Onion]

[πηγή: youtube Get On That Pole! – S House – Ep. 3 The Onion]

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